Age-gap relationships are as widespread as ever. From decades ago up until today, time has proven the ever-so-high frequency of these age-gap relationships whether locally or worldwide. Celebrity couples that are renowned for the age difference between them are Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta-Jones, Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively, as well as Nick Jonas and Priyanka Chopra. Such unions echo beyond the silver screen, permeating our cultural consciousness through cinematic masterpieces like American Beauty, An Education, and the infamous Lolita. This begs the question… Does society still view a woman who marries a man ten years her senior with the same ridicule and contempt? An equally important question is… When can the age-difference be addressed as a gap?
Not too long ago, when fathers had the final say on whether their daughters should tie the knot, the choice of suitor often always fell on a man of an older generation to the woman. That was just the norm at the time. But after women gained enough self-autonomy to govern their own choice of suitor, we have come to see more marriages within the same relative age group. In theory, this is more logical, but who said that love must be tied by such expectations of age? We do not choose who we love (or as the saying goes, the heart wants what it wants).
Most people think that the so-called “gold-digging” is the primary motive behind going through with age-gap marriages, but what if there is no wealth or power to reinforce that motive? What if the motive was true love? What if the motive was to search for warmth and love that a parental figure does not provide (as Freudian as this sounds), so the person went looking for it? On the one hand, some studies have found that the level of understanding and fulfillment between couples who have an age gap of more than ten years is rather low. In fact, they may even face total rejection from society. On the other hand, other studies have confirmed that marriages with a considerable age gap tend to be more stable.
We asked a few individuals about their opinions on the matter, and we got a variety of opinions that range from being pro, against, or neutral to age-gap relationships.
Mariam, 24, says that it all depends on each individual’s age. “I won’t mind marrying a 32 year-old when I’m 25. On the contrary, I would never marry a 30 year-old guy when I was 20, wouldn’t have made sense.
Yasmine, 25, had the complete opposite opinion. She personally thinks that if an age gap between a couple is more than seven years, the relationship would likely then be doomed. Naturally, her personal preference is a guy in her same age group.
Kareem, 28, championed a kinship of spirit over chronology, advocating for shared interests and a youthful mindset. “I see a lot of people around my age with interests of a 50-year-old. I believe that a shared mentality and energy is more important,” he shares.
Yomna, 23, says “I grew up surrounded by old people. My first-ever crush was my brother’s friend who was 15 years my senior. I grew up striving to get closer to these age groups until I almost shared their soul and mindset. I eventually lost any link there is to the people of my generation. And now I find myself leaning towards a marriage with a large age gap.”
In conclusion, after hearing what different people had to say about this age-old debate (pun intended), we can tell that age-gap relationships are never subject to judgment. Many support and others just don’t. Each one expresses their opinion based on their own upbringing and life experiences. There are those who have seen girls marrying men old enough to be their father’s age for the sake of money, and there are others who witnessed true love stories that were forged and nurtured in the age gap between two lovers.
And you, would you be part of an age-gap relationship?
